Somtimes pizza times it sometimes it sometimes it pizza times pizza

sometimes pizza times it sometimes it sometimes it sometimes pizza times pizza was the debut session of the Skypewreck Doods. It was GMed by Garrett and took place on July 7th, 2013. The game consisted of an escape from a burning motel followed by the tactical delivery of 3 drugged pizzas to specific targets. General consensus was that it went very well.

Characters
Viyve as Octodad Mr. Staub as Richard Faustmann Nokra as Autismo Conchobhar as Rasputin

Summary of Events
The party is awoken from their slumber in the No-Tell Motel, a moon motel, after the fire alarm went off. Autismo started with a live grenade in his inventory, so he threw it at his door. The door shrapnel immediately flew into Octodad's face. They put out some of the fire by giving a fat man severe diarrhea and then using him to smother the remaining fire. Rasputin knocked a woman unconscious because she be frontin'. Octodad's trebuchet burned in the parking lot and he cried octo tears.

They escaped into the parking lot, and a snow monkey driving a white, unmarked van convinced the suspicious crew to take his mission in exchange for success on the moon. They were to deliver 3 pizzas laced with anti-mind-control drugs to important people to resist the mind control of the town's dictator.

The First Pizza
The first pizza was delivered to a creepy old lady senate member. She cocked a shotgun when the door was knocked, so Staub sneaked in the backdoor. Meanwhile, Autismo and Octodad convinced the lady that they were travelling dildo salesmen and managed to get in the door. Rasputin totally killed it on his charisma roll and made her fall in love with him. They got in. Once in, they held her at gunpoint and fed her the pizza, then knocked her out. On searching her house, they found a nordic sword, a frozen bottle of chocolate syrup (which Autismo enchanted with his autism), and a cthulhu fetish. And in the basement, a skeleton holding a bag of pop rocks. Faustmann grabbed both its skull and the pop rocks.

The Second Pizza
The second pizza was to be delivered to a hermit in the moonjungle. When they entered the jungle, an Alligator attacked, but was impaled on the frozen autismsyrup. 5 minutes later, 2 more alligators attacked, grabbing both of Autismo's legs and trying to tear him apart. Faustmann threw the skull infused with pop rocks, and the Alligator swatted it back with his tail, but Staub resisted the evil magic that was apparently present.

Octodad jumped on one alligator and tried to blind it, but its eyes retracted into its head and its eyesockets snapped on his tentacles, entrapping him.

One alligator was dealt with via Octodad shooting it with the old lady's shotgun, and the other was chopped in half with Faustmann's bare hands. Both Rasputin and Autismo tried to surgically extract both of the alligator hearts, but they couldn't find them in the alligator corpses. Quicksand was then passed over uneventfully.

In the middle of the woods they encountered a rickety shack. Faustmann opened it and exploded. The target was hiding in the nearby woods and shot Faustmann in the face. Searching for supplies, Rasputin stumbled upon a bulldozer in the woods, clearing the woods to remove their hidden foes' cover. Faustmann, wounded, went berserk from doing moon grass and charged right into their foe. Now that his position was obvious, Rasputin bound him with vines. Autismo got kind of creepy and sat on him and rubbed the pizza all over his face, and slowly inserted the pizza into his throat. They confiscated the rifle and high-tailed it.

On the way back, a sombrero surfaced on the quicksand. And a tiger jumped out from under it. Rasputin befriended it. They then encountered a cave on an alternate route back. Faustmann, without investigation, divekicked into it and killed a bear cub. Faustmann, fearing retribution from the mother, pressed his "Irrisitable self-destruct button" and had a heart attack. Acting quickly, they extracted the bear's heart and replaced Faustmann's. The mother bear then treated Faustmann as her cub. He fully recovered using bear love.

No alligators were encountered on the way back, but instead they were holding the monkey in the van hostage. The Tiger got a godly success on the first alligator, soaring into the heavens and completely disencorporating the foe. The Tiger permanently learned to fly it was so amazing. The other alligator ran for its life.

The Third Pizza
The third pizza was to be delivered to King Christmas. They drive to the lunar arctic and wait for the repair of Octodad's trebuchet. In the meantime, they fought a frost worm and a yeti, the latter of which almost totally fucked their shit, in part saved by Octodad throwing his cthulhu fetish like a pokeball, and out of it coming a falcon companion. After the snowstorm caused by the yeti subsided the trebuchet arrived, and Faustmann and Octodad convinced the driver to give them his goggles. Autismo infiltrated the castle with the trebuchet and explored the guard tower, where he found decapitated captain planet. He skinned him and made a disguise that Octodad put on which in turn made everyone believe he was captain planet himself. The rest of the team came over and infiltrated the king's chamber, and Faustmann removed his moustache and used it to upgrade his nazi level. They then tore open his mouth and restrained him, firing a pizza roll out of a rifle into his mouth with a failed oneliner. They then looked out the window and saw a giant anchovy wearing a fedora.